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being treated like shit is not in my psyche, and I try to tell Phil, after all these years of captivity, I want to be free to be me, and most people fear this. I'm not able to write anyone because of how bad things are with my family. Phil and I knew, things are going good for us, and still they would all find something wrong. I doubt there's any love in their hearts. I go thru the worst of targeting, one of the worst disabilities, then they purposely try to ruin me.

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I'm more rational today

 just a combination of many things, social media, no free speech, after all the time I've spent, Phil's diagnosis, my fight for justice inching on 30 years of fighting, and seeing no light at the end of tunnel, thinking I'm doing it all myself, and can't get a simple reply of encouragement. plus I do everything to access, and getting burnt out so often, they made fun of me about that too, when so many people are like me.  you think you got me figured out, think again! I've decided to stay on my blog, and keep Messenger, and the internet, but no social media posts anymore, but I haven't deleted any account.