grutzworks3

here's the truth about conspiracy.

I just applied for Phil to get health insurance.  Major accomplishment.  It took about an hour, all online, quite easy.  I went thru ehealth, and our household income qualifies for a tax credit, for an individual plan at $70 per month premiums, $20 doc visits and prescriptions. But they will also first see if he can get Medicaid, which I'm thinking is going to happen. He's still out of work, and if he gets on Medicaid, he'll have to stay under $1300 a month if or when he does go back to work. This is one huge worry I'm taking care of, and we'll be notified by mail with a week or two.  My point of contact is Iowa Health Link. Yay. 

Guts I went to get my bearings, hang-ups risen by degrees and the polished sky perfectfully breakable as fine china, releasing a deep knawing of being, undelivered again, and getting out, really getting it all out, without delay. Everyone could no longer handle a trying at open spaces, demanding a curb to excessives, a sign to obey, and a  mind to stop thinking, stop ticking, stop charming. I'll slip.  Falling is easy when you've stood too long for something, throwing shadows and dead limbs. I take it double with a condition.  Triple with a heart. Alright, that's all I have to say.  I've always been loud. s.grutz  

but if I'd left the state (iowa) in the last 60 days.  hmm.

but cuts hundreds of regulations for the environment that Obama had in place, defunds landmarks, parks and state cultural emenities. I'll never forget the day NPR said all this cutting of regulations is a good thing.

At this point, doing online activism should be the way to go during this pandemic, but I'm thinking of getting signatures in person, just be on the spot, and take any heat. Anyone, anywhere, can fight for me simply by using the slogan, Free Sheri!  a wrongfully blacklisted woman in rural America.

I'm just thinking out loud.  Don't hold me to every word I've said.

I'm going back to work.  Full time light industrial packaging.  Pays good, hope I can handle wearing a mask all day.  Have to.  Have to stick it out.  Instant money for us.

If the television commercials are right, Joni Ernst has voted time and again against pre-existing conditions for health care and services. It may or may not mean that she doesn't have a heart, but rather, works to erase everything Obama has done by following Trump's words of "winning" and any other Repub who aligns with "Us vs. Them" so the innocent are caught in this crossfire. You can't even imagine how many times I've written to her over my daughter's CF, and what wasn't there, until Obamacare. Huge disappointment that my voice went nowhere.

sit, stare, or move, up to you.  Get that first line down right away, and don't lose it. You could start one sharp line, short, then build your next lines. I used to go short, then long, distress signal, but even all short, or, all long are good. Trust yourself.  Best to not know anything, not even really try, just open. You could make a tidy poem by coming back and fitting the premise you established into the end. Determine your language to be uncommon to daily speech, and fitting to poetry. Don't use heavy, big words, but use it like practical math. Good luck.  Do it!

hate to drop the bomb shell, but maybe if you continue to ignore and hide away, you'll be ok.

but I still remember being in my crib, and my brother throwing shoes at me. ha. "Oh what a lonely boy..."  that's going to go in Live 2.

see "In-voice" in This Sky I Know. This is the only poem in the book that got it right.

funny how it gets like that when you resort.

That's other people, mom.  I happen to care about humanity.  ha!

you get nothing preferential now.  it's been said, should have shatter bombed at age 18. We weren't like that Beth.

is it mandatory?  I don't know how it is for you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yQHhqDRn4_c

you fucking Wuss!

you fucker, you do that hauling away again, you're gone!!  I'd sooner lose my house, and take my chances with strangers!!!

you'd do better painting your skin black.

We're supposed to be prairie! so glad the new neighbors won't be leaving it in their obit, like Lauren Jaspar.  RIP.

Phil is getting married to the t.v.!!  I'm throwing the party.  It'll be great, everybody will be there!

it should have ended though.

remember, I don't do threesomes. kinda got the feeling when I woke up today, he's quitting me.

Thank you for your surveillance, Sheri. you're welcome.

And I WILL be watching from heaven how my legacy unfolds!

if anyone can find the orginal studio version of "Wasted Time"  please post on my timeline, FB.

everyone involved in this has gone crazy.

they still think everything I do or say is all being done for them, for an audience, on purpose, merely because of being watched. They think all of it, Is Me Feeding Them!!

it all comes across as so funny.  can't help but laugh.

"it's a mother responsibiliy to inform her daughter about rape before going to college>" Fuck, she's 51.

1-800-273-8255. National Suicide Prevention Hotline. Is it just me, why'd you hang up on me 3 times. (don't you get it Sheri, you're all Glam Rock, you're not death break bones and stuff rock. Do we really gotta talk to her.) fuckers.

Royalties Earned  (What's this?)  Marketplace Currency eBook Royalty Paperback Royalty Total Royalty Amazon.com USD 0.00 0.00 0.00 Amazon.co.uk GBP 0.00 0.00 0.00 Amazon.de EUR 0.00 0.00 0.00 Amazon.fr EUR 0.00 0.00 0.00 Amazon.es EUR 0.00 0.00 0.00 Amazon.it EUR 0.00 0.00 0.00 Amazon.nl EUR 0.00 0.00 0.00 Amazon.co.jp JPY 0.00 0.00 0.00 Amazon.in INR 0.00 0.00 0.00 Amazon.ca CAD 0.00 0.00 0.00 Amazon.com.br BRL 0.00 0.00 0.00 Amazon.com.mx MXN 0.00 0.00 0.00 Amazon.com.au AUD 0.00 0.00 0.00

The end of love There are dark nights in the town that run out of exits, running out of patience, especially with nothing on the shelves but books, when we couldn’t grow anything but cold. Something grows tired on vines and low trees and it always looks like bruises, wondering if I’m still good. You and I had a few choice words, a few delectable moments, what I did my rain dance to, “Good Life” by Inner City, and really stomping out grapes, really loosening the soil. I wasn’t made for gardens. I wasn’t made to wash my breasts like tomatoes. There is the good dirt that came from blood and knew my name was in a bucket like an abundance of words would feed someone all season. Where were you? I danced until the time ran out and we saw the body cutting itself on the teeth of wild nights. There in the dark, you were those seeds we fed the birds from shadows that ruined what we grew, the birds taking off like...

The Suspect Target has been captive of their own audience, their own engagement of daily life against a large current of misshaping the reality of what the person thinks, dreams, or imagines themselves to be. It is designed to make use of a human puppet into a scheme of oppression that takes whole the world they're living in, forcing an attempt of making sense on a graph of the power unaccountable. Lifetime attempts. The body record. The indisputable.

it has been known somewhere in my personal history that I went to them over combined forces of remote abuse knowingly ignored and subjegated on innocent citizens. The surveillance issues perpetrated against a targeted individual have superseded the American way of life, belief, or action to perform a lasting impact for the good of humanity.

I just woke to huge electric vibration thru my vagina. I guess I'm awake now.

Religion has helped you not!!!!!

  Brain functions that can be activated remotely include: -The so - called Voice-to-skull (voices in the brain or* synthetic telepathy *) through the auditory cortex; -Brain Imaging ( producing images directly into the brain , and generating vivid dreams); -Mental pain (brain shocks, sensation of electric shock and electric current in the body); -Production of physical pain from brain electrical stimulation (toothache, muscle pain, stomach pain, etc.); -Production of sparkling lights ( phosphenes ) and production of phantom presence sensations by activating the left temporoparietal junction; -The Heart (can be paralyzed, delayed or accelerated by the adequate stimulation of certain cortical and subcortical structures); -Respiratory movements (rhythm and amplitude can be controlled remotely); -Secretion and gastric motility ; -Mental Functions (thought flow, language control, aggressiveness); -Sensory Functions (listening to sounds and seeing images produced by the target brain thro...

Sheri!  Why the fuck do you listen to the radio??

+personal independent scholar on classic literature +advanced reading, writing, speaking skills +all classes on CNA, but no certification +vast knowledge on diversity, and disabled populations +attention to detail, quality work +recognition for community service/volunteering +religious education teacher 2 years, 6 months teaching in behavioral school +ambitious and loyal when it is mutual +home owner for up to 17 years now +generous to good causes +pro-active on politics, current events, and social media +physically able to perform any task +quick learner resume attached.

never stop believing that art changes the world, Sheri.

no real lines are coming to me yet.  just this idea.

impressed by the titles of my poems in This Sky I Know. it's a must read. and come back to.

blogging or on Facebook, I'm leaving out words, unintentionally. if I don't go back and reread it, it won't make any sense. also, drop dead tired all the time. almost fell in the bathroom today.  taking the OTC every morning. you know, Phil, and my mom, they think I'm risen emotionally because of beer drinking.  No one realizes that I break. It's been up to 26 years of surveillance targeting, so the breaks I have, could be artificially induced.  If it's Scary Sheri, then I guess I'll have to accept that.  But remember, I'm not to blame for any of this.

Your son running around in here Sheri isn't like any other. ok.

They think, every woman in this town, and beyond, "You think you're such a good cook, a good mother, a good image.  My daughter does numbers around you."

you just said 10 dollars an hour. your ad said 12 dollars an hour. "no it just got raised from 9 dollars an hour." So, basically you don't care about economic variances in the market, and tell us to just accept. There is nothing in this job, but a pay check. hello? There's no aesthetic. hmm. I'd hire those with a felony.

There's no mystery or black magic here.  oh fuck.

you got him what 2 or 3 years.  hmm?  think, Sheri.

oh shut up Sheri!  no one wants to hear it!

Sheri , Thank you for applying with  Marsden Building Maintenance . I was recently notified by the hiring manager that the part time position in Davenport Iowa has been filled. We apologize for the inconvenience. We will keep your application on file for the next 30 days and we will contact you there is a new job opportunity available. If you would like to be removed from the call back list please notify me by email. You may also check our website to stay up to date on any current job openings. 

I know this one did.  mine.

Dollar General, DeWitt Iowa, kid walks right in front me shopping, nothing. "Well excuse you!" nothing. check out, kids wanting toys, screaming, kids screaming behind me, obese mother with 3 obese kids going on and on with cashier. "Really?" "yeah really." "no sack, no receipt." Jesus, why do I love the poor? listen up Sheri, you didn't have another kid, and every Christian now will make you pay for your sins! oh fuck it. "When did you turn into a grumpy old man, Sheri." hmm, it happens.   listen up, Sheri! it's a market. the guy said it. They'll pay you for character development. oh shit. Edit or delete this Like  ·  Reply  ·  11m Sheri Grutz   they'll pay you for getting their kids in line, for being thin, for financial services.

"i don't know how many times I've tried to reach you!!!" Dave found a 50 dollar bill in the restroom.  I think we ate for a few days. There, I was too mesmerized.

RIP.  carry on in twilight.

I think I did a lot better with these thoughts when I was an avid reader.

I'm like X 10 for some reason. Must be workin'. change back, or just disappear.

one reason I got the hell outta I.C.

Morning's heart breaks like a fortune cookie black birds on a white clothesline. s.grutz

member on sz.com says, Enjoy the site now, this free speech might not be here forever. Free speech?  omg.

these terrible, torture dreams.  here I thought I was kind of over all that. I need to make sure Phil understands this.

"9-11" "I'd like to order a large pepperoni." "Is someone there in the room?" "Yes.  How soon will it be here." "I'll dispatch someone immediately." they're all trained for this call.

Since I just became a Sustaining Member of NPR morning edition, I'm hearing today, an ad or a plug from the local broadcaster for Midwest Basement Repair:  "we will make your house clean, and healthy."  it's that word, 'healthy' that got to me.  Sheri has never given us a picture of health.  Fuck off.

also,  sz.com  doesn't realize what it does to my mental health when they delete and remove me so often, and this, hopefully is my last. I'm schizophrenic too, and still struggle with thoughts that I'm a bad person, all imaginary made up lifelong emotional tagging thru this surveillance. I'm not dwelling on suicide, but I worry a spontaneous response to another wrong against me. and if I don't stop sleeping these days and nights away, I'm never getting my life back on many different levels. just drop dead tired. nurse coming this Thursday, really wanted a psych nurse, but probably not. will ask about this dizziness, sleeping, and weight loss.

Stop being a control freak. Suggest him working on a farm, or in landscaping. Get a new family pet, and let your son live with you. Realize he will sleep. a lot. Make it his responsiblity to take his meds and get to doc appts. he is not a broken person, he is carrying this like a soldier. Respect! Don't start correcting him, blaming him, and being like you're the total normal person. Take inventory of yourself! Be an example of what you hope he will be, but realize, he may not. Let him make mistakes. Take the good with the bad, and remember, he may not see the future.

"Dont comment on my post again squirrel your a sarcastic condescending ass wipe ive seen your comments for months your a troll dont comment again." Yeah, totally true about Mr. Squirrel,but Daze saying it would have automatic suspension! This guy is still on there.

idk.

Well, you better be pissed.  "This doesn't need to be posted a second time, Sheri.  I'm trying to be respectful to you."  Well don't hurt yourself. They have taken everything from me!  Don't you fucking get it!

Typically plays, are plays.  They are One Act plays, or longer. I would have no idea how many people have written 10-minute plays, the way I have, or that I even stopped calling them that and went with 'sketches' which could have been skits, especially things I was acting out as a child. I have posted openly about all of the genres and target audience of writing I have done, and I'm proud of how vast and varied it all is, starting just with poetry, and really growing beyond my wildest dreams. One place I have talked about it is on sz.com.  I have no proof of what another woman on there has tried copying from me, but she has already mentioned her "10-minute plays, and sketches" her exact words.  I called her out on this to say that this is too close for comfort for me, and I was suspended for 3 days. Then I posted just the other day, my birthday pic, and she posted her pic on my thread saying she looks and is a lot like me. Well, I took this one...

Summer swings The catch phrase is chased beyond getting like an additional home run to a big lead or a cutting into distance with a day grip Discoveries are made in water already reaching a point of changing the last to the first when details are in between There's someone who says it's everywhere if you're in the thick of it and read so well like a favorite season meant to be finished I had a history unearthed for the world they will put in a museum and never use s.grutz

I went out yesterday early evening, and I had NPR playing on the car radio, and the Marketplace report was talking with a woman who mentioned something about her 'job reputation', which sounded a lot like advice, or criticism against me. These people are still acclimating this tragedy of mind control/surveillance torture into, "It's no big deal," they've become so used to seeing and hearing and watching me, that they miss the greater reasons why my life is so difficult, and that their involvement is partially to blame, and then that I'm just like anyone else, and THIS is, is you and everyone that becomes a part of your surveillance is just how they keep the heartbeat of America. oh fuck.  I'm never getting out of this.  It's been clear since the beginning.

This is not waiting The replacement of energy was an idea before truth. Someone thought, no matter if it's good or not, we are the source of connections. We make use of what they do, burning as they do, we make the sight for sore eyes seem like nothing. When the clock itself is an engine. Stalled, side-tracked, wild words are growing little face or hands in the telling. Bitter roots or bending to reach a deep down day pressed, as a lull takes over a radiance speaking of working hours, collecting a  last minute survival in various lengths. There is a wall unbuilt to fit capacity of free thoughts in or about each part of what symptoms show, detectives arrest the eager one worn in the wind, dry eyes caught in the act of confusion. This is not waiting.  This is locked land. And someone opened minds to this. s.grutz    

Broken.

Rarely.

Counter-questions for new employer: Will there be a man or woman working here who will intentionally or unintentionally not want my presence at this job either because of image or persona I present during working hours, or online that will prevent me from doing my job? Will I get protection from any person or gov, slander or intentional harassment that creates an unhealthy environment to work in? Will these inter-personal problems be heard and addressed by H.R. in this company, resolved, and not lead to any kind of action that will diminish the desire to work hard, feel appreciated, or seen as a person who does not get along with people? (dreaming, Sheri)

And where does it stand now.  And why Sheri do you make it look so easy?

"yeah.  Please move on to something else.  We're another person who doesn't want to deal with you."

certainly you must know that your contacts don't want to hear this, a chain message. I've done it one or two times to my contacts, and my lover said, No way. Usually I only do them to make the sender feel better that I have. I Don't Know You. for instance, you never respond to my posts. I don't see yours. Please don't mistake me for someone who would take heed to this message.

it's not even true.

it's gas.

Once, Phil thought I was paying for gas at Kwik Star, and I thought he was paying at the pump. It was never paid. The next day when he went in, they said he didn't pay. How cool is that? yeah, we owe stock in this company, they had better treat us good.

This is not waiting The replacement of energy was an idea before truth. Someone thought, no matter if it's good or not, we are the source of connections. We make use of what they do, burning as they do, we make the sight for sore eyes seem like nothing. When the clock itself is an engine. Stalled, side-tracked, wild words are growing little face or hands in the telling. Bitter roots or bending to reach a deep down day pressed, as a lull takes over a radiance speaking of working hours, collecting a  last minute survival in various lengths. There is a wall unbuilt to fit capacity of free thoughts in or about each part of what symptoms show, detectives arrest the eager one worn in the wind, dry eyes caught in the act of confusion. This is not waiting.  This is locked land. And someone opened minds to this. s.grutz    

Well, alright, Iowa!

I might need to take action over that water mat I bought for my grandson on April 29.

My review of Rudy's Tacos in the East Village, lunch today. We weren't greeted when we came in, and I had to ask a young woman who seemed to be working there, talking to a couple of people casually at a booth, if they were open. They were open, and the place was lovely in decor, slightly rustic, with light American music playing. Phil choose a far corner booth, cushioned and spacious, easy to get in and out of, but we found out we were sitting right by the take-out window, the only people we saw with masks on. The waitress brought us regular menus, not disposable kind, and we decided quickly. They did not give chips and salsa. I ordered the Southwestern Chicken Salad, and Phil got a combo meal. My came on a beautifully designed big plate, and Phil's came on about 3 separate smaller, slightly boring plates. Food came in about 10 minutes from ordering. His did not come with enchilada sauce. The only thing that came in a bottle was the hot sauce, the red ketchup kind of bottle...

anymore, even in reflections, is this really me?

He'll be sorry he ever said that to me.

There is no strict cut-off point. In most cases, ten people is not really a crowd. But 100 people usually is. The conceptual difference is when you stop noticing the individuals and only see the group. But this is not a rule of English. If you consider other languages that you know, you will notice that words like "crowd" are not (usually) defined exactly as a particular number

  I heard it would only take one person, from either side, to start such a thing. Ironically, it was Obama term making it federal offense to incite a crowd to riot. it was during Occupy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rj73lCWeZQw

Unbleached coffee filters. I can’t find them anywhere in my town. I used to use them all the time, after reading that the bleached kind CAN do a number on those with depression.

Sometimes people must think, It's understandable, Sheri, that you got pd. sz, you have two disabled kids, a single mom, a difficult life. I really don't think it works like that. but it is one reason why they give us a check. to get us out of absolute poverty.

they said on the radio broadcast over the weekend, “Be drunk on the Holy Spirit.” poets have said, Be drunk… (on something) but seems oxymoron to be drunk on the holy spirit, that would be a very sobering thing, unless you went to the more charismatic churches.

2 dead.  Many other neighboring cities police got involved.  Now at 6 a.m., they're telling people to still stay home.  about 100 cars and 45 incidents.