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the next sketch I'm going to write is called The Yes Man, in which a convict is doing my own creation of a lie detector test that includes zaps for incorrect responses until he is forced to say Yes.

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closed my bank debit card

 will go into the bank for cash, and I just ordered checks, the ones with carbon paper underneath each  and I'm not getting a pre-paid card for stores.  just cash. Won't be buying Anything online.  wanted to do more in person anyway. $39.55 and $39.99 fraudulent charges showing up on online banking I'll have to absorb these. I think I'm safe.